Wilson, Wade

Wilson, Wade Oct 1, 2012 19:08:20 GMT 1

Post by wade wilson on Oct 1, 2012 19:08:20 GMT 1

WADE WILSON.
DEADPOOL. 31. 04/04/81. SUPERVILLAIN. RYAN REYNOLDS.
ANDY. 23. GMT GLASGOW. PM ME FOR ALL THAT FUN STUFF.

S.H.I.E.L.D INTERROGATION VIDEO NO. 0255512011-1906
[PLAY]

S.H.I.E.L.D agent Harold Smith stands with an extremely large dossier in his hand before placing it on the small interview table. The costumed mercenary known as Deadpool is sat and restrained opposite from Agent Smith.

AGENT SMITH: "Agent Harold Smith beginning the interview with the mercenary Wade Wilson, more commonly known as Deadpool. The time is now 19:06. Subject has been disarmed, his suit is still worn, due to...disfigurements."

DEADPOOL: "Hey, listen up, buttercup. If you looked like a mix between Freddy Krueger and a cheese pizza, you'd wear this stylish number too!"

SMITH: "Why don't you tell me about your past, Wade? Before you joined the military."

DEADPOOL: "Y'know Harry, if you want to get in my pants, you're failing hard. You could just take me out to dinner, by me some wine, maybe some Haagen Dazs, I'll give ya that look if things are going your way, you'll see the twinkle in my eye and then-"

SMITH: "That's enough Wade, just answer the question. It will make things easier on you. We wouldn't want you to get hurt now would we?"

Deadpool stretches his arms up in the air, his restraints apparently proved ineffective. He starts laughing and leans back in his chair and places his hands behind his head. It almost appears as if he's trying to get comfortable.

DEADPOOL: "C'mon Harry, do you really think that you could hurt me!?

Deadpool looks directly at the security camera filming the interview

DEADPOOL: "Excuse me!? S.H.I.E.L.D...people. Can you give me whatever this dick is on? He's trippin' balls!"

SMITH: "We captured you Wade, we could easily find a way of putting you down like the wild dog you are."

DEADPOOL: "I love it when you talk dirty. BRB!"

Deadpool vanishes for a moment and then returns with a dish from the mess hall, filled with what appears to be watermelon.

DEADPOOL: "I friggin' love watermelon!"

Deadpool lifts his mask to expose his mouth, the deformed tissue on his face is also visible, he starts to eat chunks of the watermelon and speaks with his mouthful. Agent Smith pulls out his firearm and aims it at Deadpool

DEADPOOL: "Seriously, you guys thought I didn't let you catch me?"

SMITH: "Why would you let us capture you?"

DEADPOOL: "Because I needed something to put on my app for the forum...duh."

SMITH: "What? You really are insane as they say."

Deadpool finishes the watermelon. Then vanishes again, this time appearing behind Agent Smith before taking his gun. Deadpool puts the gun to the back of Agent Smith and pulls the trigger repeatedly. Blood splashes over the walls and the Agent groans in pain.

DEADPOOL: "BANG BANG! BANG BANG BANG BANG!"

Deadpool looks back up to the camera and shrugs

DEADPOOL: "Hey, that guy was a douchebag anyway. Peace guys, next time just Facebook me, less guys will die...probably. Or check out my shipping page. Hashtag Shield sucks!"

Deadpool vanishes again and the video turns to static

[STOP: END OF VIDEO]

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Post by wade wilson on Oct 1, 2012 19:08:20 GMT 1

Post by admin bee on Oct 1, 2012 20:27:37 GMT 1